March 05, 2011 - 11:58
I wish I could psychically transfer the abiding love I have for you in my heart, and mind.
You are the only friend from childhood that I hold pure, dear, and sacred. That is the truth. The memories of our time together as children and beyond are some of my fondest. That will always be the truth.
I'm so sorry that I've been distant, hard to tie down, and just generally dodgy. Your attempts to reach out to me have not at all gone unnoticed, I think it is beautiful that we have remained in contact, and haven't gone the disparate way of so many of the people that I knew as a youth. To be completely honest with you, I have just been having a really, really hard time this last year and a half. A lot of my relationships have suffered, familial, and friendly.
You are such a kind and generous friend, and my inconstant ability to meet you half way has left me sometimes guilty, and thus, causes me to retreat.
I love you so much. I think about you a lot, and believe you are one of the most perfect human specimens I've ever met. I am socially imperfect. I am not as good as you are at letting the people around me know that they are loved. I keep it in my mind, but am not always able to translate it to the tangible world. You remain a wonderful example to me. Of how I want to be, and a person that I hope to keep in my life forever. Thank you so much for your friendship, I Love you *****.
A form letter to send when your Mom dies unexpectedly, your childhood friends keep reaching out to you, but you don't have the emotional energy to extend, even though you really do love them.